Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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