I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
