Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
