tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
