Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Randomize
