Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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