in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
