Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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