Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
