Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
