I wish I only lived at night.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
