Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
