The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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