We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Randomize
