I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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