Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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