"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
