He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
