that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
