and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
