Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
if only i could text you this smell
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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