Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
just tell him i said nine months
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
