I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize