garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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