Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
