is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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