he thought i was a dude.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
