I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize