Nicole vs. Life
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
