well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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