Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
