I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
