i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
