Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
