Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize