we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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