mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Randomize
