She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
