I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
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