i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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