I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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