I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
