Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
