I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
