found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
