we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
