This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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