big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize
