Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
