I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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